[ the word bounces around inside his skull like an echo.
eventually.
he knows what it means.
but some part of him, for a skip in time, refuses to return the logical answer and remains blissfully unaware. eventually. later, he'll wish he could have held onto this moment. eventually. and then it clicks. that means, after everything— castiel goes still as a statue, staring down at his drink. it appears far away, like someone else is in command of the hand holding it. he reaches out to set the glass down before realizing there's nowhere for it to be put. eventually.
eventually.
like it was inevitable. like it really was a lie, all the scrabbling they did in the dirt to mark their own paths. dean is, apparently, fine. and michael dead. but it doesn't change much about this new reality that he's being introduced to. dean, alive is the only thing he can hold onto out of all of it, and even that has its caveats. dean will not, of course, live forever.
castiel's mouth opens and closes softly before a minute or more later, he finally speaks. ]
Lately, I've been... wondering, if it might've been better not to rebel.
no subject
[ the word bounces around inside his skull like an echo.
eventually.
he knows what it means.
but some part of him, for a skip in time, refuses to return the logical answer and remains blissfully unaware. eventually. later, he'll wish he could have held onto this moment. eventually. and then it clicks. that means, after everything— castiel goes still as a statue, staring down at his drink. it appears far away, like someone else is in command of the hand holding it. he reaches out to set the glass down before realizing there's nowhere for it to be put. eventually.
eventually.
like it was inevitable. like it really was a lie, all the scrabbling they did in the dirt to mark their own paths. dean is, apparently, fine. and michael dead. but it doesn't change much about this new reality that he's being introduced to. dean, alive is the only thing he can hold onto out of all of it, and even that has its caveats. dean will not, of course, live forever.
castiel's mouth opens and closes softly before a minute or more later, he finally speaks. ]
Lately, I've been... wondering, if it might've been better not to rebel.