[ of course, he has no idea what jack has done in these past three years of life, so he can say no more to absolve him. and he can't blame sam and dean for their distrust, either, or himself his own. jack is a problem. he's a much more powerful creature than they've ever had to face, and how can you raise something with love while also fearing it? he can only imagine his own failures. and sam and dean, well, they're only human. they were never prepared for this. they didn't ask for it; none of them did.
castiel takes a pause and swallows down half of his drink. he can feel it humming at the edges of his mind, eating at the corners. barely a buzz, but a change. he's been weakened since coming here. maybe he's been weakening for a long time. ]
Who says we're forced to live? I think I've just been... too afraid to die.
[ amara was right. she was right about everything. ]
cw talk of suicide \ suicidal ideation
[ of course, he has no idea what jack has done in these past three years of life, so he can say no more to absolve him. and he can't blame sam and dean for their distrust, either, or himself his own. jack is a problem. he's a much more powerful creature than they've ever had to face, and how can you raise something with love while also fearing it? he can only imagine his own failures. and sam and dean, well, they're only human. they were never prepared for this. they didn't ask for it; none of them did.
castiel takes a pause and swallows down half of his drink. he can feel it humming at the edges of his mind, eating at the corners. barely a buzz, but a change. he's been weakened since coming here. maybe he's been weakening for a long time. ]
Who says we're forced to live? I think I've just been... too afraid to die.
[ amara was right. she was right about everything. ]