I... [ something in castiel breaks, too. even if it's not for the same reason. jack might be a good man (boy?) but god has been dethroned. his father usurped. everything has changed so much, and he's only a part of it. tossed around in the flotsam. he drinks what he can from his glass with his hand still experiencing fine small tremors, before hanging his head, defeated.

he can't help but at admit to it, even though his fear is galling.

an angel— an angel should never be afraid. ]

I know. I know that things have changed for the better. But there's still a part of me that wants— That wants to go back to how it was before.

[ his voice cracks. he rubs a hand over his face.

ridiculous. he's being ridiculous. ]